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Environmental groups call for $20 million city investment to address private sewer line leaks in Houston

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Tuesday, April 16, 2024

public domain Among a list of demands, environmental groups Tuesday called for the city to invest $20 million to repair certain sewer line issues in low- and moderate-income communities in Houston. Advocacy organizations Northeast Action Collective, West Street Recovery and Bayou City Waterkeeper say private line sewer leaks are creating health risks to families and Northeast Houston residents. Nonprofit group Bayou City Waterkeeper in 2018 served the city a 60-day notice of intent to sue more than 9,000 sewage overflows that violated the Clean Water Act and disproportionately affected lower-income Houston communities of color, according to the organization. The letter prompted the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency and the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality to file a federal enforcement action. A federal judge in 2021 approved a legal settlement requiring the city to invest $2 billion in its sanitary sewer system through 2036. Under the consent decree, the city has paid $4.4 million in fines for past overflows and at least $1.4 million in penalties for ongoing sewage overflows. RELATED: Houston's Sewers Could Soon Get A Multibillion-Dollar Upgrade But environmental groups say there’s something the consent decree doesn’t address— private laterals, which are lines connecting homes and businesses to the main sewer system. Of the billions of dollars that will be spent over 15 years, none of it will be invested into fixing private sewer lines, especially in lower-income communities of color, Doris Brown, a co-founder of the Northeast Action Collective asserted on Tuesday. “This is unhealthy, and we absolutely need help,” she said. The city has reported 1,701 sewage overflows associated with private sewer laterals from July 2022 to June 2023, according to an annual report. That’s down from 2,636 overflows reported the year before. Private sewer lateral leaks flow into streets, onto neighbors’ yards and into rivers and streams. “For problems with private sewer laterals, the consent decree focuses on education and enforcement, rather than providing financial assistance for repairing broken sewer lines, as cities like Jackson and St. Louis have done,” according to the organization’s action plan. Houston Public Works didn’t immediately respond to requests seeking comment. “We see three years after this consent decree… that there are things happening but they’re not happening on a scale that will have a major impact on our communities,” Kourtney Revels, a Water Justice Organizer with Bayou City Waterkeeper said. “The gaps in the consent decree have created huge challenges in addressing Houston’s poo problem.”

Environmental groups say there's something the consent decree doesn't address— private laterals, which are lines connecting homes and businesses to the main sewer system.

city-of-houston-storm-sewer-lid

public domain

Among a list of demands, environmental groups Tuesday called for the city to invest $20 million to repair certain sewer line issues in low- and moderate-income communities in Houston.

Advocacy organizations Northeast Action Collective, West Street Recovery and Bayou City Waterkeeper say private line sewer leaks are creating health risks to families and Northeast Houston residents.

Nonprofit group Bayou City Waterkeeper in 2018 served the city a 60-day notice of intent to sue more than 9,000 sewage overflows that violated the Clean Water Act and disproportionately affected lower-income Houston communities of color, according to the organization. The letter prompted the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency and the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality to file a federal enforcement action.

A federal judge in 2021 approved a legal settlement requiring the city to invest $2 billion in its sanitary sewer system through 2036. Under the consent decree, the city has paid $4.4 million in fines for past overflows and at least $1.4 million in penalties for ongoing sewage overflows.

RELATED: Houston's Sewers Could Soon Get A Multibillion-Dollar Upgrade

But environmental groups say there’s something the consent decree doesn’t address— private laterals, which are lines connecting homes and businesses to the main sewer system.

Of the billions of dollars that will be spent over 15 years, none of it will be invested into fixing private sewer lines, especially in lower-income communities of color, Doris Brown, a co-founder of the Northeast Action Collective asserted on Tuesday.

“This is unhealthy, and we absolutely need help,” she said.

The city has reported 1,701 sewage overflows associated with private sewer laterals from July 2022 to June 2023, according to an annual report. That’s down from 2,636 overflows reported the year before.

Private sewer lateral leaks flow into streets, onto neighbors’ yards and into rivers and streams.

“For problems with private sewer laterals, the consent decree focuses on education and enforcement, rather than providing financial assistance for repairing broken sewer lines, as cities like Jackson and St. Louis have done,” according to the organization’s action plan.

Houston Public Works didn’t immediately respond to requests seeking comment.

“We see three years after this consent decree… that there are things happening but they’re not happening on a scale that will have a major impact on our communities,” Kourtney Revels, a Water Justice Organizer with Bayou City Waterkeeper said. “The gaps in the consent decree have created huge challenges in addressing Houston’s poo problem.”

Read the full story here.
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It’s time to strike an environmental grand bargain between businesses, governments and conservationists – and stop doing things the hard way

It shouldn’t take sustained public outrage to stop environmentally destructive projects. Nature positive offers us a way forward.

jenmartin/ShutterstockApril has been a bad month for the Australian environment. The Great Barrier Reef was hit, yet again, by intense coral bleaching. And Environment Minister Tanya Plibersek delayed most of her Nature Positive Plan reforms. True, Plibersek did reject the controversial Toondah Harbour proposal, but only after a near decade-long grassroots campaign to save the wetland from an apartment and retail development deemed clearly unacceptable by her own department. Rather than fall back into old patterns of developers versus conservationists, we have a rare chance to find a compromise. Labor’s embrace of “Nature Positive” – a promising new environmental restoration approach – opens up the possibility of a grand bargain, whereby developers and business get much faster approvals (or rejections) in exchange for ensuring nature as a whole is better off as a result of our activities. Sustainable development was meant to save us First, a quick recap. We were meant to have put the era of saving the environment one place at a time to bed a long time ago. Around 1990, governments worldwide took to the then-novel idea of sustainable development. We even had a special Australian variant, ecologically sustainable development, which our federal and state governments backed unanimously. This led to a national strategy and incorporation into well over 100 laws, including flagship laws like the Environment Protection and Biodiversity Conservation Act, passed in 1999. The basic idea was, and is, sound: encourage development to improve our quality of life, while maintaining the ecological processes on which life depends. Read more: Australia's long-sought stronger environmental laws just got indefinitely deferred. It's back to business as usual But it’s not what ended up being legislated. The 1990’s laws did not require developers to make their projects sustainable. Typically, sustainable development was watered down into principles ministers only had to “consider”. Meanwhile, our ecosystems have continued to go downhill. And in a 2020 review of the laws, Graeme Samuel pronounced the EPBC Act a failure. Nature, positive? When Labor was elected in 2022, it promised a new goal: “Nature Positive”. This idea is no mere slogan. Nature positive is a serious policy idea. Think of it as the biodiversity counterpart to net zero emissions. The goal is ambitious: stop the decline by 2030 and set about restoring what has been lost for a full recovery of nature by 2050. Rather than ticking boxes on whether principles had been considered, regulators would answer a much more basic question: will this development deliver a net positive outcome for nature? Measuring progress is core to nature positive. We would take an environmental snapshot at the outset and track the gains and losses from there. Like sustainable development before it, nature positive has been adopted with gusto by the Australian government, internationally and domestically. In 2022, Plibersek committed to “stop the slide” and to “bake [the Nature Positive reforms] into law”. Now, suddenly, we have lost momentum. The crucial part of the reforms – embedding nature positive in stronger environment laws – has been kicked down the road. Plibersek has blamed complexity, extensive consultation and the need to get it right. Others see political concerns. Could we strike a grand environmental bargain? By pushing these laws back, Plibersek has effectively turned the already extended consultation process into an open-ended negotiation. Given consultation will keep running indefinitely, we’re now in the realm of regulatory co-design, previously only on offer to First Nations representatives for new cultural heritage protection laws. Co-design implies proceeding by consensus. It would be politically embarrassing to run a consultation over years only to bring down the policy guillotine. Consensus in turn raises the possibility of a grand environmental bargain, built around nature positive. Could this work? Might environment groups settle for a limited form of nature positive? Might business, in return for much faster approvals or rejections, support much stronger legal protection, especially for particularly vulnerable or important ecosystems? Samuel certainly thinks so. At a recent Senate Inquiry, he recounted telling a meeting during his review: If you each stick to your aspirations 100%, you’ll end up getting nothing. If you’re prepared to accept 80%-plus of your aspirations, you’ll get them, and that will be a quantum leap forward from the abysmal failure that we’ve had for two and a half decades What might an 80% agreement look like? If we are to turn decline into recovery, we need to ensure each natural system is intact. That is, it retains the minimum level of environmental stocks (such as animals, plants and insects) and flows (such as water, nutrients) needed to sustain ecological health. If flows of water into wetlands drop below a certain threshold, they’re not wetlands any more. AustralianCamera/Shutterstock Such thresholds for ecological health are everywhere. For example, keeping the platypus off the endangered list would involve maintaining its population close to current levels and working out how much of its riverbank habitat should be conserved. For policymakers, this suggests environmental laws should define minimum viability thresholds. Some thresholds would be absolute; others would be crossable in one location provided equivalent restoration was done in another. Environmental groups could take satisfaction that thresholds would be maintained in most cases. Ecosystems would function, rivers would flow. But governments would still override thresholds for important economic and social reasons, say to approve a critical minerals project. What’s in it for corporate Australia? Business would gain upfront certainty about what can be approved and quicker approvals for projects. Environmental litigation would fall. But development options would be narrowed and offsets would become more expensive. The government would achieve a key goal: major environmental reform. But it would have to say no more often, and be transparent about crossing environmental thresholds. It would have to finance the science and planning needed. And it would need to boost investment in environmental restoration, to compensate for using override powers and for the cumulative impact of smaller-scale activities. A grand bargain along these lines would not deliver nature positive in full. We’d still be losing nature due to climate change. But it might go close enough to offer hope of long-term recovery. Is such a deal feasible? It depends on how players read the incentives for compromise. For example, business will not want to be locked out of prospective development areas, but will also be worried about the possibility of a minority Labor government dependent on the Greens next year. Nature positive in Australia is down – but opportunity remains. Read more: Out of alignment: how clashing policies make for terrible environmental outcomes Peter Burnett is a member of the Biodiversity Council, an independent expert group founded by 11 Australian universities to promote evidence-based solutions to Australia’s biodiversity crisis. This article does not necessarily reflect the Council's views.

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My Husband And I Went Looking For Pot. It Quickly Turned Into A Nightmare.

"The guy with glazed eyes neglected to tell me that the beginning dose should be no larger than half of a grain of rice."

At every social gathering of middle-aged people I’ve been to recently, almost everyone has an “I tried a THC gummy bear because I couldn’t sleep and found myself in the emergency room or about to call 911” episode to share. The weed from when my friends and I were younger pales in potency to the variants available today. And taking a hit, a slice or a pill can feel like dropping acid during the ’70s did. (At least from my limited experience, this seems to be a fair assessment.)A friend told me that she ate a gummy on vacation to relax and avoid getting seasick on a boat. But instead her teeth felt thick, she couldn’t keep up with the conversation around her, and she thought she was having a stroke. “I had a two-minute delayed response to everything, so I just went to bed and slept for 10 hours,” she said.One man I met told me he was having dinner at a country club with friends during Dry January. When he declined a drink, his waiter insisted that he try the club’s new seltzer, an artisan extract with the tag line “THC for the people” and the quote “Caution is the path to mediocrity” by author Frank Herbert on its website. He was unaware of how high he was — or that he shouldn’t be operating a motor vehicle — until, on the way home, his wife turned to him when he stopped at a green light and asked what he was doing. “I have no idea,” he said.More middle-aged people are using marijuana than in previous years. Meanwhile, poison control centers are receiving more calls and states are seeing increasing numbers of ER visits due to people passing out, hallucinating or experiencing other issues as cannabis (legal or not) becomes more readily available in many parts of the U.S.I had my own misadventure with the drug seven years ago, before it was legalized for recreational use in California, where I was visiting from Alabama for breast cancer treatment. My husband and I went looking for pot, but this hunt wasn’t like the ones I went on as a teenager. I needed cannabis to ease any post-chemo nausea I might experience and to help blunt my anxiety the night before I’d be hooked up to the “red devil” for the first time.Another patient had told us about a medical dispensary in Santa Ana. At the large, slick metal building tucked indiscreetly behind a shiny shopping center, I signed up for a membership with the dispensary’s club under the name “Lanier Insomnia” so a remote doctor would “prescribe” something for me. However, I quickly learned that it was illegal to dispense to anyone who was not a resident of the state.That’s how my husband and I found ourselves in late-afternoon traffic on the six-lane highway headed to a “church” of “cannabis ministries” in a low-slung building next to a motel and a tattoo parlor. There were several doors in the strip center with darkened windows but not one sign.It was getting dark, and as we stood on the sidewalk trying to figure out where the church was, a man appeared from a black SUV, asked us if we needed help, and took us to the right door. Inside a small waiting room with a receptionist behind a glass panel, I filled out a membership form for my new church, where I became a believer in cannabis and pot was a sacrament, and I waited while a TV played a program about waltzing black holes. Once I was buzzed into the next room, a young man behind a glass counter full of pipes and paraphernalia convinced me that all cancer patients needed “Ricky Simpson oil,” or RSO.I now know that Rick Simpson was a skin cancer patient who read about a study in which THC killed cancer cells in mice, so he came up with a process of extracting as many cannabinoids from the cannabis plant as possible, making a substance that was high in THC and extremely potent. The guy with glazed eyes neglected to tell me that the beginning dose should be no larger than half of a grain of rice.That night at the hotel with red curtains and scratchy carpet where we had been staying for several weeks, a weather map of California on the TV blazed wildfire red. My husband gallantly offered to do a test drive of the oil for me, which meant dabbing it on a joint. After a while, when he didn’t feel anything, he added more RSO, and at that point I insisted it was my turn.The next thing I knew, I’d become a thousand raw nerve endings. Everything took on a cartoonish feel. The only thing to do was to try to sleep, but the walls were breathing. I did doze off but woke up to my husband pacing the floor and yelling into the phone, “Hey, Siri, can you overdose on Ricky Simpson oil?” Siri didn’t respond, and I cannot tell you how many times he yelled at Siri while I kept thinking there were men with guns in the parking lot about to invade our room.The following day, we were both jagged. I was in the worst possible state to deal with chemo, but things were going OK until I accidentally ate someone else’s lunch from the refrigerator at the cancer center. When the hungry woman demanded to know why I ate her lunch, I could only sputter some nonsense and thank Ricky for my predicament. Later, when I started crying, all I could say to the bewildered nurse was: “I’m from the South. People cry there.”When I told the doctor what happened, she asked: “Why didn’t you say something? I could have prescribed you something less potent.” Studies have shown that cannabis can ease stress, nausea and pain; decrease inflammation; and help with certain health conditions like epilepsy. But if you’re going to partake — for medical reasons or just a good time — you should know that things are different from the Cheech and Chong days, when it took an entire joint to get high.Now, you don’t even need RSO to be launched into orbit. With just a few hits or a tiny piece of cannabis candy, you can become fully baked because, over the past 50 years, the average amount of THC in cannabis products has increased — sometimes as much as tenfold. Back in the day, smoking a bowl of brown sticks and stems was like eating Kraft cheese, while what’s sold today is more like fancy feta cheese. It’s great to get more bang for your buck, but you want to make sure you’re aware of just how much bang you’re getting.So, if you’re looking to buy some edibles, smoke some weed or drink some cannabis-infused tea from one of the thousands of dispensaries across the country, know your state laws. And when you travel to another state, get up to speed on its laws too. Make sure that the product you buy has a certificate of analysis to ensure quality control and low toxicity. Consider buying from a Black-owned business. (Despite the disproportionate number of weed-related arrests that Black individuals have historically faced, in 2021 under 2% of cannabis businesses were owned by Black entrepreneurs — all the more reason to support them.) Then, do some research to understand potency levels, learn the difference between the types of products, check for other ingredients and additives, and go slow. One of the great things about buying cannabis today is that there’s more variety, and most products list how many grams of THC you’ll be consuming per serving. That means you can slice that gummy in half, just have a few puffs, or devise whatever way feels right to customize your high. Lastly, it’s not a bad idea to talk to your doctor before using cannabis, especially if you’re taking medications that could interact with the drug.Since my disastrous experience in that hotel, I’ve tried weed gummy bears a couple of times for anxiety, but I didn’t like how disoriented I felt. During the teenage wasteland of the ’70s and ’80s, I loved that fun-house feeling and the ritual of smoking pot with my friends. Weed was everywhere, and my brother making hashish from a gadget he ordered from the back of High Times with the pot he grew in a friend’s basement, or our suburban backyard, wasn’t unusual. I now realize that when I smoked in my 20s, I was simply trying to take the edge off my stress. By the time I became a mother, I felt I couldn’t find real relief at the bottom of a bong — it just didn’t do anything positive for me anymore — and I found other ways to cope. Still, for many people, especially those my age, it’s a positive thing. Live and let live, right? But if you’re going to do it, make sure you’re as prepared as possible, and maybe skip the Ricky Simpson oil.Lanier Isom is a journalist and co-author of the award-winning memoir “Grace and Grit: My Fight for Equal Pay and Fairness at Goodyear and Beyond.” The film “Lilly,” based on her book and starring Patricia Clarkson, is in postproduction. Her work has appeared in Al Jazeera, The Los Angeles Times, The Lily, The Bitter Southerner, Scalawag and Salvation South. A frequent contributor to AL.com, she is an Alabama Library Association Nonfiction Award recipient and a 2023 Alabama State Council on the Arts fellow. She has completed a memoir about growing up in the South during the ’70s before #MeToo and is currently working on a project about environmental racism in a small Alabama town. A blue dot in a red state, she lives in Birmingham, Alabama, with her husband and three dogs, and has a college-aged daughter and grown son. She’s a Peloton addict, dog lover and psychic junkie. For more from Lanier, visit lanierisom.com and her Instagram page, @lanierisom.Do you have a compelling personal story you’d like to see published on HuffPost? Find out what we’re looking for here and send us a pitch at pitch@huffpost.com.Support HuffPostOur 2024 Coverage Needs YouYour Loyalty Means The World To UsAt HuffPost, we believe that everyone needs high-quality journalism, but we understand that not everyone can afford to pay for expensive news subscriptions. That is why we are committed to providing deeply reported, carefully fact-checked news that is freely accessible to everyone.Whether you come to HuffPost for updates on the 2024 presidential race, hard-hitting investigations into critical issues facing our country today, or trending stories that make you laugh, we appreciate you. The truth is, news costs money to produce, and we are proud that we have never put our stories behind an expensive paywall.Would you join us to help keep our stories free for all? Your contribution of as little as $2 will go a long way.Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.Dear HuffPost ReaderThank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?Dear HuffPost ReaderThank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you’ll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.Support HuffPostAlready contributed? Log in to hide these messages.

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Remote working and whiffy workout wear fuel laundry revolution

Home workers aim to tackle smelly athleisure clothing, save money and be kinder to the environmentFor years, laundry detergents have focused their cleaning power on stain removal and getting whites white but now a new invisible enemy has emerged in the shape of the musty smell that clings to your gym gear.The shift to remote working has fuelled the popularity of “athleisure” clothing such as T-shirts, joggers and leggings which, rather than shirts and dresses, are now the default work wardrobe of many Britons. Continue reading...

For years, laundry detergents have focused their cleaning power on stain removal and getting whites white but now a new invisible enemy has emerged in the shape of the musty smell that clings to your gym gear.The shift to remote working has fuelled the popularity of “athleisure” clothing such as T-shirts, joggers and leggings which, rather than shirts and dresses, are now the default work wardrobe of many Britons.But less commuting means 70% of the clothing we stick in the drum have no visible stains, according to new research. Instead it is impregnated with invisible sweat, dust and smell-causing body oils, with the issue acute for “malodour-retaining” athleisure wear.Eduardo Campanella, the business group president at Unilever Home Care, which owns household names including Persil and Comfort, explains the source of the problem: “Athleisure wear is made from synthetic fibres which have been specifically constructed with a capillary action to wick away wetness from the body.”“In addition to this, synthetic fibres are more hydrophobic [oil-loving] which naturally hold on to body oil and body excretion. As a result, athleisure wear is more prone to malodour.”But because the clothes at least look clean and energy – and in some cases water – bills are so high, Britons want to get rid of any lingering smells but also want to use shorter wash cycles that are better for the environment.‘The Queen of Clean’, AKA Lynsey Crombie. Photograph: Linda Nylind/The GuardianIn response, Unilever has launched the Persil spin-off Wonder Wash which it says does the job in 15 minutes.With some hyperbole Unilever boasts that this new “15-minute laundry detergent”, with its 35 patents pending, will “create a new category of laundry products”.It comes at a time when, under pressure to improve their environmental credentials by removing harsh chemicals and working at lower temperatures, traditional washing powders and liquid-makers face competition from new eco products such as plastic-free washing “sheets” that are becoming a more common sight.The new cleaning elixir contains a blend of fast-acting ingredients, said Campanella, who in layperson’s terms explained the technology “binds to malodour molecules ensuring they don’t stick, as well as pulling the malodour molecules out”.While the company’s scientists used cutting-edge robotics and AI to come up with the formula for the smell-busting detergent, which sells for about £7 a bottle, there are DIY remedies. Store cupboard ingredients such as bicarbonate of soda and white vinegar are among the popular, cleaning hacks suggested.Lynsey Crombie, the TV cleaning expert and influencer known as the “Queen of Clean” uses the tried-and-tested method of pre-soaking gym kit in cold water and white vinegar before washing.skip past newsletter promotionSign up to Business TodayGet set for the working day – we'll point you to all the business news and analysis you need every morningPrivacy Notice: Newsletters may contain info about charities, online ads, and content funded by outside parties. For more information see our Privacy Policy. We use Google reCaptcha to protect our website and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.after newsletter promotion“Sports clothing hangs on to sweat and if left in the laundry basket too long before washing can transfer on to other items”, she said. “If I could eliminate this process [pre-soaking] and save myself time, that would be great.”For many households, who still measure the time it takes to do a wash in hours not minutes, being able to get the washing done in 15 minutes is still a long way off.Shorter cycles of 30 to 60 minutes arrived more than a decade ago but more recently new machines with 15-minutewashes have gone on sale. But with the appliances replaced every seven to 12 years such high-speed washes will take a while to reach the mainstream.With extremely high standards as the Queen of Clean to maintain, Crombie says short cycles have their place and “clean everyday clothes well”. But, she adds: “Towels, underwear and bedding I still wash on a higher temperature on a longer cycle.”

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And now for the pinchline: competition crowns world’s funniest crab joke

Inaugural contest at Crab Museum in Margate allows crustaceans to pick the winner, with the help of tinned fish used as baitHow did the crab get out of prison? And why did the crab get bad grades?The answers to these conundrums and other clawsome jokes were among the competitors for the inaugural World’s Funniest Crab Joke competition, held by the Crab Museum in Margate to celebrate International Crab Day.What do you call a red crab piggybacking another red crab all around the town? A double-decapod.A horseshoe crab walks into a bar. “Why the ventral face?” the bartender asks. The crab replies: “Mind your own business and please tip a pint of lager and a packet of crisps on to the pub carpet.”How did the crab get out of prison? It used its escape claws.Why didn’t the crab help the chicken cross the road? Because it was eaten by a pelican crossing.What did the sea urchin say to the crab? Please sir, can I have some claw?What format do you have to save photos of crab soup on to? Floppy bisque.A man walks into a restaurant with a crab under his arm and says: “Do you make crab cakes?” The manager answers: “Yes, we do.” “Good,” says the man, “because it’s his birthday.”How do barnacles get around? A taxi crab.Why did the crab cross the road? It didn’t. It used the sidewalk.Why did the crab get bad grades? Because it was below C level. Continue reading...

How did the crab get out of prison? And why did the crab get bad grades?The answers to these conundrums and other clawsome jokes were among the competitors for the inaugural World’s Funniest Crab Joke competition, held by the Crab Museum in Margate to celebrate International Crab Day.The winning gag, submitted by an anonymous joker, was: “Why did the crab cross the road? It didn’t. It used the sidewalk.”An expert panel of judges, including the comedians Harry Hill, Rose Matafeo, Sally Phillips and Phil Wang, as well as children from Ramsgate Arts primary school, scored their favourite jokes before the totals were tallied and a winner crowned.The only rules of the contest were that the jokes should be kept PG, and that lobsters could be mentioned in the setup of the joke, but not the “pinchline”.Organisers said that, although most of the 700 submissions did abide by the rules, several jokes “were disqualified for scientific inaccuracy, and rather a lot for lewdness”.In an unexpected sideways move, the crabs themselves picked the winner from the four jokes ranked highest by the judges, with the help of some tinned fish in bait bags and rolled-up pieces of paper with the jokes written on them.The twist on the classic road-crossing formula proved triumphant, and was followed in second by another variation on a classic: “Man walks into a restaurant with a crab under his arm and says, ‘Do you make crab cakes?’ Manager answers, ‘Yes, we do.’ ‘Good,’ says the man, ‘because it’s his birthday.’”Third place was awarded jointly to: “Why didn’t the crab help the chicken cross the road? Because it was eaten by a pelican crossing,” and: “What format do you have to save photos of crab soup on to? Floppy bisque.”A Crab Museum spokesperson said the organisers hoped the contest might inspire people into environmental activism: “The quality and quantity of jokes this year has been astounding. We’ve been pinching ourselves since the submissions closed! That said, laughing at jokes, much like learning about crabs, can be a powerful tool to help us reassess our relationship with our environment. You’d be surprised how quickly you can go from chuckling at crab gags to letting down SUV tires. Whilst we may not have made this clear to our judges, it is in this spirit that the World’s Funniest Crab Joke competition has been organised.”The museum, which opened in 2021 and claims to be “Europe’s first and only museum dedicated to the decapod”, aims to raise awareness of the often unheralded but incredibly diverse world of crabs.skip past newsletter promotionThe planet's most important stories. Get all the week's environment news - the good, the bad and the essentialPrivacy Notice: Newsletters may contain info about charities, online ads, and content funded by outside parties. For more information see our Privacy Policy. We use Google reCaptcha to protect our website and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.after newsletter promotion“Crabs can teach us about biology, climate change, evolutionary history and much much more. But, with the right frame of mind, they can also teach us about ourselves,” said a spokesperson for the museum, which was founded by Bertie Suesat-Williams, his brother Ned Suesat-Williams and Chase Coley.“This is why we created Crab Museum, to roll science, humour and philosophy into a unique and satisfyingly baffling day out.”The museum’s award-winning social media presence was called “radical and unhinged” by Digital Culture Network.The full shortlist of crab jokesWhat do you call a red crab piggybacking another red crab all around the town? A double-decapod. A horseshoe crab walks into a bar. “Why the ventral face?” the bartender asks. The crab replies: “Mind your own business and please tip a pint of lager and a packet of crisps on to the pub carpet.” How did the crab get out of prison? It used its escape claws. Why didn’t the crab help the chicken cross the road? Because it was eaten by a pelican crossing. What did the sea urchin say to the crab? Please sir, can I have some claw? What format do you have to save photos of crab soup on to? Floppy bisque. A man walks into a restaurant with a crab under his arm and says: “Do you make crab cakes?” The manager answers: “Yes, we do.” “Good,” says the man, “because it’s his birthday.” How do barnacles get around? A taxi crab. Why did the crab cross the road? It didn’t. It used the sidewalk. Why did the crab get bad grades? Because it was below C level.

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PGE rate hikes: Oregon regulators say they can’t dismiss increase request

The Oregon Public Utility Commission declined to dismiss Portland General Electric’s newest rate increase proposal, rejecting a motion filed by a state nonprofit group that advocates for utility customers.

The Oregon Public Utility Commission declined to dismiss Portland General Electric’s newest rate increase proposal, rejecting a motion filed by a state nonprofit group that advocates for utility customers.The decision Thursday means PGE’s proposed 7.5% increase will go through the regular lengthy rate-setting process.The increase likely would go into effect next January if approved – though the utility may file for other increases later this year.The Oregon Citizens’ Utility Board had asked the commission to throw out PGE’s rate request, saying people are reeling from record high bills. It’s the first time the board has made such a request.PGE increased rates for its electricity by 18% on Jan. 1 and 12% in January 2023.Under Oregon law, a regulated utility may file a proposal to change general rates at any time. Typically, the Public Utilities Commission conducts an investigation that can take up to a year to determine if rate changes are warranted. Various parties, including the Oregon Citizens’ Utility Board, participate in these cases.The Public Utilities Commission said it did not have the legal authority to dismiss the utility’s latest rate increase proposal.The commission also said throwing out a rate filing undermines the integrity of its rate-setting mechanism and commission deliberations.“A reactive decision could erode the value of the long-established, evidence-based process for consideration of requests for rate adjustments,” the commission said.Bob Jenks, executive director of the Citizens Utility Board, said his group was disappointed with the decision.“We think there is a big problem with PGE. It is operating under an ‘all of the above’ business model,” said Jenks, referring to PGE’s strategy to invest in an array of technologies from wind farms to battery storage to decarbonize its system and meet ambitious state mandates. Oregon requires PGE to reduce its carbon emissions by 80% by 2030 and by 100% by 2040.“Strategy involves identifying the best way to deploy your resources,” Jenks told The Oregonian/OregonLive. “It requires prioritization. PGE acts as if everything is an investment opportunity and their customers have unlimited wallets.”PGE spokesperson Drew Hanson said PGE “will continue to be fully engaged in the public rate review process administered by the Oregon Public Utility Commission.”The governor-appointed three-person Public Utilities Commission evaluates costs – such as operating and maintenance expenses, asset depreciation and cost of capital – and expected revenues, then determines rates that allow for “prudent and reasonable costs” to be recovered from customers, according to state law.Typically, said Jenks, the commission approves rates at a lower level than what utilities request. But, he added, PGE has filed multiple rate increase proposals in recent years for power costs, renewable energy projects, electric vehicles, wildfire mitigation, storm recovery and energy efficiency among others and they add up throughout the year.Rate changes usually go into effect in the middle of winter when energy costs are already high, so the increase hits harder, Jenks said.The public can comment on PGE’s latest increase proposal at a virtual event on May 16, via an online form or by emailing the commission at PUC.PublicComments@puc.oregon.gov. Comments must include the docket number, UE 435.— Gosia Wozniacka covers environmental justice, climate change, the clean energy transition and other environmental issues. Reach her at gwozniacka@oregonian.com or 971-421-3154.

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